Naomi Lapaglia: You're not fucking taking my goddamn fucking kids! Naomi Lapaglia: Money. In 2013 it was adapted into a movie by the same name. Oh, Jesus Christ. Expensive champagne and the what, we had to buy champagne. The waves are 20 feet high and building! Yeah, there's something a little bit different about his eyes. Jordan Belfort: The 3 keys to success in Straight Line Persuasion. vials of coke. It was the sort of silence shared by two people who're comfortable enough not to force a conversation ahead of its logical progression. And eviscerate your enemies. We don't give two shits about how technology works, 'cause all we care about is getting fucking RICH! Nicholas the Butler: Act as if you have unmatched confidence and then people will surely have confidence in you. Leave your emotions at the door. Jordan Belfort, The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you cant achieve it. Jordan Belfort, 97% of the people who quit too soon are employed by the 3% who didnt. Jordan Belfort, Hard work beats talent. In which case, you know, we could start fresh. No, baby. Jordan Belfort: Integrity. Linette Lopez. Even though I own 85% of Steve Cocksucking Motherfucking Madden Shoes, the shares were in his fucking name! Don't you fucking dare! [after shipwreck] That's who you're gonna be sitting next to! We want to hear what you have to say but need to verify your email. Jordan Belfort: Well that's good news. Your profit on a mere $6,000 investment could be upwards of $60,000! If anyone is gonna fuck my cousin it's gonna be me, out of out of respect, you know? Listen to me, if you piss up the SEC's leg, you end up with your tits in a wringer. The Cerebral Palsy phase. I still have family over there, though. [raves at Brad] You people are all shit out of luck. Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: Fuck you! Hi, how you doing? They're not gonna dial themselves. with updates on movies, TV shows, Rotten Tomatoes podcast and more. Jordan Belfort: Donnie Azoff: Did you cum? You can save the fucking spotted owl with money. An I.P.O. Sound good, John? Jordan Belfort: That's the stupidest shit I've ever heard in my fucking life! It's got no no alcohol. Don't you dare throw that fucking water on me! When you get really good at it, youll fucking be stroking and youll be thinking about money. Mark Hanna, Her father is the brother of my mom. I don't wanna die, Jordan! Cause I cant keep track of your professions honey! It doesn't even Donnie Azoff: That's the fuckin' point. You gotta be a fucking pal You know what, I'm gonna give you a fucking pass, just give me the case. Theyre wrapped in sheets. Don't fucking dare throw that fucking water at me. You don't think I'm gonna see my fucking kids again, huh? Jean Jacques Saurel: [Donnie haphazardly gets out from car] I have been a rich man and I have been a poor man. Pick up the phone and start dialing! The movie depicts Jordan Belforts reckless adventures from his rise to a wealthy stockbroker to his seduction and free-fall into corruption, drug abuse, excess and ultimately imprisonment. Naomi Lapaglia: Dont worry, it wont take long. Good luck on that subway ride home to your miserable ugly fuckin' wives. I mean, we had similar interests and shit. Jordan, this is how it's gonna go. Cunt, cock, asshole." I love you. All right, get the fuck off my boat. Jesus Christ, I think you have a fuckin' drug problem. What's he doing? Donnie Azoff: The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can't achieve it. Yeah. Turns out you're completely off the hook, honey. This is what you do? Naomi Lapaglia: Robbie Feinberg, the Pinhead, took five years to finish high school. And from now on, it's gonna be nothing but short, short skirts around the house. the success of scorsese's wolf of wall street is that it's enjoyable to watch and it shouldnt be. Alden Kupferberg: This is a fucking mayday! Even more fucked was that he got busted for shit that had nothing to with me. Nothing. Look! The fucking hero I'm gonna be back at the office when the Bureau seizes this fucking boat. I told you, you're not taking my fucking kids. Together with his trusted lieutenant (Jonah Hill) and a merry band of brokers, Belfort makes a huge fortune by defrauding wealthy investors out of millions. We call the Verrazano's Bridge the Guinea Gangplank. All rights reserved. Copyright Fandango. I mean, when she married me she knew what she was getting into, didnt she? That'd be 40,000 shares, John. Act as if youre a wealthy man, rich already, and then youll surely become rich. Donnie Azoff: Let me tell you something. That conniving twat! Like, we grew up together, and she grew up hot, you know, she fucking grew up hot. But who the fuck wanted to live there? Jordan Belfort, Let me tell you something. I don't wanna die, Jordan! Robbie Feinberg ('Pinhead'): Get the ludes downstairs! Do I Do I I jerk off? Jordan Belfort: I mean, who the fuck wanted to live there? Act as if you have unmatched confidence and then people will surely have confidence in you. Pick up the phone and start dialing! Yeah, yeah I jerk off. What are you, a fuckin owl? Naomi Lapaglia, Oh my God! Baby, you know you got real anger issues. A master diver! I don't even listen to it. Jordan Belfort: This is Captain Ted Beecham aboard the yacht Naomi! She you know, her her father is the is the brother of my mom. Jordan Belfort: Hello, John. Oh, Jesus Christ. Jordan Belfort: Yeah! I don't drink anymore. Yeah, there's like a 60 percent, you know 60, 65 percent chance the kid's gonna be fuckin' retarded or whatever Jordan Belfort: If you don't, you will fall out of balance, split your differential and tip the fuck over. [All at once] Jean Jacques Saurel: You're not fucking taking my fucking kids! Jordan Belfort: Mark Hanna: Please reference Error Code 2121 when contacting customer service. That'd scare the shit out of me, buddy. [Naomi slaps Jordan and he slaps her back]. Turn around! Three or four times, maybe five. You know what a fugazi is? Its a whazy. Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: I'm sure we'll be seeing each other real soon. Jordan Belfort: Not to mention countless dollars. Companies these people know. And once you do fall in lovethat obsessive sort of love, that all-consuming love, where two people cant stand to be apart from each other for even a momenthow are you supposed to let a love like that pass you by? Jordan Belfort. It turned out the British weren't too different from the Swiss. Once in the morning, right after I work out, then once right after lunch. My name is Jordan Belfort. That's right. Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: He's just warning everybody. Yeah. So you listen to me and you listen well. Like you married your cousin or some stupid shit, you know? Jordan Belfort: Daddy shouldn't waste his time. Next came the NASDAQs, who were one step down from the Blue Chips. Mark Hanna: I was born too - too early. Jordan Belfort: The captain tied you up, he almost fuckin' tasered you! How the fuck else are you supposed to do this job? But he didn't go along with us. Who is she? You wanna fuck me, Jordan? Jordan Belfort: The image is an example of a ticket confirmation email that AMC sent you when you purchased your ticket. So there's a silver lining to that too, honey. Jordan Belfort: Give him time. I'm the Founder of SucceedFeed.com and I truly appreciate you taking the time to read my posts and being apart of the Succeed Feed community. All Quotes You know what? Jordan Belfort: Or maybe manipulate events are the more appropriate words. They won't be able to see your review if you only submit your rating. The real question is this: was all this legal? I fucked up! You understand? Hey Paulie, what's up? Naomi Lapaglia: What is that supposed to mean, you want a divorce? I did a lot of bad shit. Across the Verrazano's Bridge. So before I approve this midget-tossing business, you need to find me a game warden who can rein in the little critter if he should go off the deep end. That's why all this confusion. Look, I know you're not following what I'm saying anyway, right? Jordan Belfort: It got so bad, I had to declare the office a fuck-free zone between the hours of 9 and 7. By opting to have your ticket verified for this movie, you are allowing us to check the email address associated with your Rotten Tomatoes account against an email address associated with a Fandango ticket purchase for the same movie. Fuzzy Bear over there? The Wolf of Wall Street: Directed by Martin Scorsese. You probably had to pay them in cash with your hands! Does your girlfriend think youre fucking worthless loser? Donnie Azoff: Okay? Some disgusting wildebeest with three days of razor-stubble, in a sleeveless muumuu, crammed in next to you in a carload full of groceries from the fucking Price Club. Her pussy was like heroin to me. Just leave us a message here and we will work on getting you verified. Donnie Azoff: I can sell anything. They usually cost a hundred dollars or less, and if you didnt wear a condom, youd get a penicillin shot the next day and then pray that your dick didnt fall off. Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: No? I'll tell you what: I'm never eating at Benihana again. Jordan Belfort: Let me know in the comments and please share this post to help and inspire others. You know those guys who got like the beard with, like, no mustache or some bullshit? The truth was that hookers did take credit cardsor at least ours did! What the fuck is wrong with you? The show goes on! You fucking bitch! Yeah. It'll also help your fingers dial faster. Does your girlfriend think you're a fucking worthless loser? What we're gonna do is this: first we pitch 'em Disney, AT&T, IBM, blue chip stocks exclusive. Give him time. Wouldn't you like to know how to sell it? Donnie Azoff: I'm gonna take custody of the kids. Brad: All right? Naomi Lapaglia: Last month you were a wine connoisseur, and now you're an aspiring landscape architect, Isn't that right? See, enough of this shit will make you invincible - able to conquer the world. Tell me. Last month you were a wine connoisseur, now you're an aspiring landscape architect. I think you have a fuckin' drug problem. Donnie and I were investing in a condominium complex in Venice. Donnie and I were going out on our own. I don't even know who Venice is. Why didn't you tell me, sweetheart? I myself, I jerk off at least twice a day. Good! Her father is the brother of my mom. Naomi Lapaglia: Oh, hey! Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: Is she like, a first cousin? Jordan Belfort: I started this website because I wanted to help people like you to maximize their potential and achieve their dreams. A real wolf pit, which is exactly how I liked it. No it's not like that. Oh, hey. Donnie Azoff: You hear me? More importantly, you will learn. Now as the firm taking the company public, we set the initial sales price then sold those shares right back to our friends. Come on. And any fines that I have to pay wouldn't be due until after I've served my term, so we'd still have plenty of money leftover. Donnie Azoff: You just made love to me. In fact, you never did anything wrong in the first place. I don't understand. Just below that it reads "Ticket Confirmation#:" followed by a 10-digit number. Alden Kupferberg, the Sea Otter, didn't even graduate. You know what my lawyer said? Out of respect. And I hate fucking chess!, And my wifewell, I guess shed earned her scene with me, but still; did she really have that much reason to be angry? So I was a little surprised you asked Christie for my number. Donnie Azoff: Mark Hanna : It's his first day on Wall Street. I'm not gonna let someone, you know, one of these assholes fuck my cousin. Brooklyn. Her name was Pam and to her credit, she did have this amazing technique with this wild twisting jerk motion. Fuck. OK. Jordy, one of these days the chickens are gonna come home to roost. That was you! Jordan Belfort: Without you, they're just worthless hunks of plastic. With their beautiful wife by their side, who's got big voluptuous tits. The Wolf of Wall Street is a memoir by a former stockbroker and trader Jordan Belfort, first published in September 2007. Where were they doing it, sweetheart? Max Belfort: Does that ring a bell? Jordan Belfort: Naomi Lapaglia: What are all the little fuckheads doing while you're here? After they left I checked the apartment. Mark Hanna: It's a woozie. Hold on! He's a Boy Scout! Number one rule of Wall Street. [Pretends to walk away, but suddenly turns back]. Jordan Belfort: Chester, who sold tires and weed. Daddy's really sorry about what he said in the other room. All the sudden I - one week - nobody had anything down there any more. . Jordan Belfort, Theyre gonna need a fucking wrecking ball to take me out of here. And you wanna know what I was just thinking too? I want you to deal with your problems by becoming rich! You know, every time someone rises up in this world, there's always gonna be some asshole trying to drag 'em down. I am not gonna die sober! Jordan Belfort: Hey, everybody, listen up! Yet Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: I got you. Right, right. Naomi Lapaglia: Di Caprio and Scorsese combine for one of the most fun financial movies of this decade. Good! [whispering] And the first thing we needed was brokers. Can I have that Danish? Looking for the best quotes from The Wolf of Wall Street? 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That's not why I do it. The only thing that of course bummed me out a little bit about this whole idea is having to give information about my friends. It recounts Belfort's perspective on his career as a stockbroker in New York City and how his firm, Stratton Oakmont, engaged in rampant . Sell me this pen! Jordan Belfort: No, I'm not fucking letting you near my kids! But before you depart this room full of winners, I want you to take a good look at the person next to you. Even more fucked, is that he got busted for shit that had nothing to do with me. Max Belfort: Donnie Azoff: a depend on what exactly? Jordan Belfort: Pride. Donnie Azoff: Theyre not buying shit. Alden Kupferberg, Who? And when it gets in, I'll give you a call and you come pick it up. Go on. Trained professionals to guide you through the financial wilderness. Say hi to Rocco and Rocco! Jordan Belfort: What the fuck are you talking about? You gotta stay relaxed. Jordan Belfort: Patrick Denham: Jordan Belfort: Feel free to reach out and connect. You know what I mean? The wolf of Wall Street they call me! Good! Jordan Belfort: [on getting arrested] Keep talking, you fucking piece of shit! Pound for pound theyre stronger than grizzly bears, and, if you want to know the truth, they happen to scare the living shit out of me. Jordan Belfort: Turns out I have so much information about the stock market and Wall Street I can save the government years of heartache. And if anyone here thinks I'm superficial or materialistic, go get a job at fucking McDonald's, 'cause that's where you fucking belong! I mean like, you married your cousin or some stupid shit. Fuck you! I got a couple of mil' comin' in like a week. [sigh of relief] And they're all shaved too. They're not buying shit. He said even if you don't get convicted I've got a good chance of getting them. Daddy shouldn't waste his time. When you do something, you might fail. Mark Hanna: Look at yourself! The best GIFs are on GIPHY. [narration] No, no, this can be explained. He must have thought we were still at the Hamptons this weekend, you know. I fucked her brains out for eleven seconds. Donnie Azoff: It's not on the elemental chart. Jordan Belfort: I'm not a scientist; I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. Belfort was played by Leonardo DiCaprio in the film . Max Belfort: Many weren't happy with the ending, though it was a very accurate representation of this day and time, and falls in line with typical Scorsese films. Stratton Oakmont. Money doesn't just buy you a better life - better food, better cars, better pussy - it also makes you a better person. Now that I'm under federal indictment with an electronic bracelet around my ankle, now you decide you don't fucking love me anymore. Sides? By the early 1990s, while still in his 20s, Belfort founds his own firm, Stratton Oakmont. Oh, my God! Manny Riskin: Do it differently each time. Every time! Jordan Belfort, When you live your life by poor standards, you inflict damage on everyone who crosses your path, especially those you love. Jordan Belfort, I believe in total immersion, if you want to be rich, you have to program your mind to be rich.
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