They should be more vivid. Heres all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. Whether youre looking for inspirational or funny quotes by George Carlin or whether youre looking for his famous quotes politics and education, its all here. Every day we present the best quotes! a[a9]._Q.push([c, r]) I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, There is no I in team. What you should tell them is, Maybe not. Nobody seems to care. What do you say? stylesheet.type = "text/css"; After all, he was one of the most successful comedians of all time! You have no choice. if (window.Mobvious === undefined) { The Grammy-Award-winning star of 14stand-up comedy specials on HBO taught us the power of words and how a person can use humor as a weapon. He was a true outspoken man that we can emulate in many ways. A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. The planet is fine. They own everything. Tell people theres an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Everything He ever makesdies.George Carlin, Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?George Carlin, Thats why they call it the American Dream because you have to be asleep to believe it.George Carlin, May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.George Carlin, Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.George Carlin, There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. Did you enjoy this article? Nothing is mentioned, though, about cursing a lack of candles.George Carlin, When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?George Carlin, The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.George Carlin, Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school.George Carlin, I have as much authority as the Pope. Weve learned how to make a living but not a life. While some of his views may not be popular among the masses, he does make an interesting point when it comes to government. They want more for themselves and less for everybody else, but I'll tell you what they don't want: They don't want a population of citizens capable of critical thinking. What exactly is viewer discretion? As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. Source; . He Was Fatally Beaten by Memphis Police Now People Around the World Are Sharing #SunsetsForTyre in His Honor, 41 Daughter Quotes That Will Touch and Melt Your Heart, 20 Most Inspiring Martin Luther King Jr. Disclaimer: As an Amazon Associate We earn from qualifying purchases. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. "Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it." ~ (George Carlin). Its what our system produces: Garbage in, garbage out. Weve added years to life, not life to years. George Carlin, 6. The real reason that we cant have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not commit adultery, and Thou shalt not lie in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. "https:" : "http:") + They own, and control the corporations. !function(){function n(n,t){var r=i(n);return t&&(r=r("instance",t)),r}var r=[],c=0,i=function(t){return function(){var n=c++;return r.push([t,[].slice.call(arguments,0),n,{time:Date.now()}]),i(n)}};n._s=r,this.csa=n}(); George Carlin "The planet is fine. They own you. If you can find a solution to homelessness where the corporations and politicians can make a few million dollars each, you will see the streets of America begin to clear up pretty damn quick! George Carlin, 67. Pictures. In his 50-year career as one of Americas most poignant and provocative social critics, the irreverent actor, author and comedian left no sacred cow unsinged as he took to lobbing one grenade after the next into the comfort zones of American life. In America, anyone can become president. Carlin and his older brother, Pat, were primarily raised by their mother in Manhattan's Morningside Heights neighborhood. Thats the problem. George Carlin, When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. Some people see the glass half full, others see it half empty. Toothpicks?George Carlin, No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. In this article, we present to you some of the famous George Carlin Quotes on Government, Marriage, Love, Life, Religion, Death, Voting, Freedom, Politics and More with their meaning. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. George Carlin, 9. George Carlin 13. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Because he was a genius, and here are 11 quotes that prove it: 1. q("f", arguments) Here is one I would suggest: Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was. Be happy with what youve got, because the owners of this country dont want that. ' George Carlin, 56. My mind doesnt work that way, I got this real moron thing I do, its called thinking and Im not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions I have certain rules I live by. You have owners. Property is theft. Im sure it made the work seem that much more urgent. George Carlin, 27. Whether we agreed with his acerbiccommentary or not, his words always reminded us of how sharp a weapon humor can be in slicing through the surface of our assumptions and leaving us, as he would say, gasping for breath.. To me, authority is something that a freer spirit, a more independent mind, and a person who can handle the world, doesnt need guidance from. In this blog post, well take a look at some of Carlins most famous quotes on government. window.Mobvious.device_type = 'mobile'; " If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else. 2023 Inspirationfeed. It always has been. The reason I talk to myself is that Im the only one whose answers I accept.George Carlin. Manage Settings War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. Governments dont want a population capable of critical thinking, they want obedient workers, people just smart enough to run the machines and just dumb enough to passively accept their situation. Thats exactly what I want you to think. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. On The Simple Solution To Parenthood's Most Difficult Question "Parents are burning these kids out on structure. Laugh until you gasp for breath." - George Carlin 3. Goalcast is an inspiring community for achievers dedicated to helping you improve all aspects of your life. If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse. The middle class pays all of the taxis, does all of the work. The owners of this country know the truth: Its called the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. George Carlin, 83.Theres a reason education sucks, and its the same reason it will never ever ever be fixed. [CDATA[ George Carlin 'Political correctness is fascism pretending to be manners.' Quotes are added by the Goodreads community and are not verified by Goodreads. // page settings That's the problem. } else { Theyre all in favour of the unborn. Good, honest, hard-working people: white collar, blue collar, it doesn't matter what color shirt you have on. In fact, George Carlin had some pretty interesting things to say about government. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid." 2. Nothing changed.George Carlin, Well, if crime fighters fight crime and firefighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?George Carlin, I think its the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("gr_author", "false"); Religion is like a pair of shoesFind one that fits for you, but dont make me wear your shoes. And I didnt really care in the first place.George Carlin, Dont confuse me with those who cling to hope. George Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another. George Carlin, 69. Sooner or later the people in this country are going to realize: the government does not give a f**k about them. The people are fucked." George Carlin "Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. var ue_sn = "www.goodreads.com"; "I have certain rules I live by. Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. Forget the politicians. - George Carlin quotes. } }); " George Carlin Quotes "Most of the country was founded by slave owners so they could be free. Carlin certainly aimed to provoke, but its the why and how of it that made him so exceptional. I really tried to believe that, but I gotta tell you, the longer you live, the more you look around, the more you realize, something is fucked up.George Carlin, When youre born into this world, youre given a ticket to the freak show. Seems like a big waste of time to me! The people are fucked! George Carlin, 80. Topics. Before, all you had to go by were these 14 quotes. Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both fucked. George Carlin, 32. , var stylesheet = document.createElement("link"); Keep in mind, the news media are not independent; they are a sort of bulletin board and public relations firm for the ruling class-the people who run things. All rights reserved. Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. George Carlin, 4. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.George Carlin, I dont have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. //]]> Hope these quotes will give you a different perspective on government and how it works. By the way, it's the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. They all said: Try to live together peacefully. BAM! 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[.] "The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept." ~ (George Carlin). "Application": "GoodreadsMonolith", If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? I love individuals. My motto: Fuck Hope! George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Im happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, If everyone in the world sat quietly at the same time, closed their eyes and concentrated as hard as they could on peace and goodwill, all the killing and cruelty in the world would continue. He made us notice the things we never did before in the form of his humor and this world will forever be grateful for this brilliant mind. The planet is fine. You know what they ought to do with churches? Pointing out the things which are influencing our society badly with humor is not an easy task to do. Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life. George Carlin, 5. I think people should be allowed to do what they want. 'Cause pretty soon they have little hats. We hope these George Carlin quotes on life, religion and government will make you smile as well as share some important facts with you. Its interested in its own power. When you are born in America, you get a front row seat. Its so fuckin heroic. George Carlin, 18. You know how I define the economic and social classes in this country? If no one knows when a person is going to die, how can we say he died prematurely? he must of been a brilliant man mostly misunderstood by most people wish i would of met him in person one on one, 51 Best John Muir Quotes On Nature, Mountains, Trees, 50 To Kill A Mockingbird Atticus Quotes With Page Numbers, Happy Birthday Nephew Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Happy Birthday Daughter Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Good Morning Happy Monday Images With Quotes, Wishes, Cute & Romantic Happy Birthday Love Images For Him, Her, Happy Birthday Dog Images With Quotes For Your Puppy, Happy Birthday Niece Images With Wishes, Messages, Quotes, Depression Quotes Images | Feeling Sad Pictures, Wallpaper, Happy Birthday Son Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Happy Birthday Husband Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages For Hubby, Good Morning Quotes Images To Make Your Day Beautiful. born on May 12, 1937, We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. I started this website because I wanted to help people like you to maximize their potential and achieve their dreams. window.csa("Config", { var source = getCookieWithoutJQuery("source"); Deal with it.George Carlin, Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.George Carlin, He and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly.George Carlin, I dont know how you feel, but Im pretty sick of church people. George Denis Patrick Carlin was born on May 12, 1937, was an Americanstand-up comedian, actor, social critic, and author. By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. You should die first, get it out of the way.
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